Tapper's Resolutions

Happy New Year to you all!  It's me, Tapper again.  I overheard mom talking the other day about something called a resolution that people make this time of year.  It took me a few minutes to understand what it was all about but I finally got that it's like a promise to yourself to be a better person or horse.  Of course, there are not too many things that I should change, but I talked with the other horses and a few of the owners and they came up with a whole list of stuff.  Some of them apply to all the horses, some are more specific to certain horses (and you KNOW who you are!!!).  So anyway, here is the list we came up with...

I will NOT try to roll when my human is on my back.
I will NOT leap over or away from large nonexistent objects when the whim strikes.
I will NOT walk faster on the way home than on the way out.
I promise NOT to poop when you are cleaning my back feet.
I will NOT bite my farrier's butt just because it's there.
I will NOT wipe green slime on my human's clothes or blow my nose on my human.
I CAN walk and poop at the same time, I can, I can, I can!
I will NOT leave if my rider falls off.
I will NOT try to mooch goodies from every human within a 1 mile radius.
I will NOT lay totally flat out with my eyes glazed over and my legs straight out and pretend I can't hear my human screaming "Are you asleep?"
I will NOT grab my lead rope in my mouth and attempt to lead myself.
I will NOT have an attitude problem, I won't, I won't, I won't!
I will NOT pull my new shoes off just to prove I can.
I will NOT eat or remodel the barn or the fences.
I WILL accept that not every carrot is for me.
I will NOT do the Sneaky Teleport Trick when a bad/naughty/awful scary thing breathes at me.
I will NOT jump in the air and turn 180 degrees every time I see a bicycle, and I WILL understand that bicycles are not carnivorous.
I will NOT bite the butt of the horse in front of me dring a trail ride just to say "hi".
I WILL put my ears forward and cooperate when it comes to photos.
I will NOT come into heat every time I meet a new horse.
I will NOT try to kick anyone, at any time.
I will NOT mistake fingers for carrots.
I WILL believe my human when she tells me that the mailbox, trash bag, rock, stump, etc. will NOT eat me!
I will NOT find the muddiest spot in the paddock to roll in after my bath.
I WILL hold up my own feet for the farrier.
I WILL move when my human tells me to, without making them use a crop or spurs.
I will NOT try to choose the shortest trails home when my human is trying to go a different way.

So there you have it, our list for 2011.  We don't promise to accomplish everything here, but we  do promise to try.